Beyond First Glances: Raising Kids To See With Their Hearts
“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart.” - Helen Keller
After a chance meeting and conversation with a grandmother at the end cap of an aisle at Target, and conversations with some family members this past weekend, I really wanted to share this beautiful analogy and the lessons that come from it with all of you and your children -
At first glance, a flower looks beautiful. Its vibrant colors catch the light, its delicate petals, each uniquely shaped. You stop. You notice, you look at it - it’s beautiful, obviously.
Then, you lean in and breathe it in. The scent is sweet, maybe a wild or even nostalgic - like a memory coming back to the surface. This beauty was invisible just a moment ago. You couldn’t see it, but now it’s all you feel. A new layer reveals itself - not to the eye, but to the heart.
Then you touch it, very carefully. They’re softer than you imagined—thin, yet strong, fragile yet resilient. You notice the texture, the deep beauty it holds, and suddenly the flower becomes more than just something pretty. It becomes something alive, something with depth. You realize then: its beauty was never just what you saw. It was what you experienced.
People are like flowers.
We notice someone first by what the eye can see - a smile, a presence, an energy that draws us in. It’s easy to appreciate the surface - but then we grow in curiosity. The real beauty reveals itself slowly. Through laughter, stories, silence, trust and kindness. Through the ways someone holds space for others, or the way they keep on despite the difficulties they carry.
The real beauty unfolds and deepens over time. In the sounds of someone’s laughter, the kindness in their actions, how they live their life and treat others, how they show up on the difficult days, how they listen and how they validate. You begin to notice how their presence feels like warmth, like peace.
The surface draws us in, but it’s what’s inside that keeps us there.
Just like the flower, it’s in the smell, the touch, the layers beneath that you realize that their true beauty is not what you first saw with your eyes, but what you slowing come to feel.
The surface draws us in. But it’s the unseen, the unfolding that keeps us there. And once we have experienced that kind of beauty, we carry it with us. It becomes a part of how we see the world.
When you learn to really see a flower for ALL that it is, you learn to really see a person, too. Not just for how they bloom in the light, but for how they grow in space.
And that kind of beauty stays with you.
Lessons for Our Children
In a world that often prioritizes appearances, how do we teach our children to see real beauty?
-
Encourage Them to Look Deeper
Help them see beyond the surface. Teach them to notice kindness, patience, and the way people make them feel rather than how they look. -
Celebrate Inner Qualities
Model and teach children to celebrate someone for their kindness, hard work, generosity, and resilience – character and values are what truly makes someone beautiful. -
Teach by Example
Model what it means to appreciate and nurture deep connections with others. Speak kindly, listen attentively, and value others for who they really are. -
Slow Down and Appreciate
Take time to observe with your children. Smell the flowers, listen to the laughter, appreciate personal connections. Teach them that beauty is often in the unseen moments.
Beauty That Stays With Us
When we teach our children to look beyond appearances, we give them the gift of deeper relationships, richer experiences, and a more meaningful ways of seeing the world around them.
When we learn to truly see a flower - not just for how it blooms in the sunlight, but for how it grows in all conditions - we learn to see people the same way. And that kind of beauty stays with us forever.
